15 smiles, oh yes
beautiful girl, lovely dress
where she is now, i can only guess
i was looking through my old myspace pictures, and i just couldn't help myself, to think, that i have changed soo fast, in only four years. this got me into the mood to talk about myself. i know it sounds weird, me writing a story on how i am, and why i act the way i do today.
soo, i was born in boston, 3.2.92. yes, im a bostonian at heart, even though i dont have the accent to prove it(i wish i did, that would be awesome)..i remember back in the day, how my dad would take me and my sis out, and take pictues like crazy. i was a beautiful baby:smooth skin, large eyes,looked like a doll. very happy with life. allways exploring, allways moving. i had my own imagination. i loved to dream.
elementary school? phsssst i hated it and loved it. people would allways tell me how beautiful i was, had crazy hairstyles that were adorable and people didnt care, teachers would call me "geraldine the beauty queen" i had trouble with school, so when i was about 6 my parents decided to place me in special edi dont know why, maybe it was because i couldnt do my homework,or the fact i just couldnt pay attention. i was already behind my other classmates, had to re-do kindergarden due to illness, felt very out of place. special ed was like kindergarden all over again: i was stil learning addiction,substration,reading,and writing(which i was good at) and i was a talented artist. i remember how my mom would help me with my math: it was NOT FUN AT ALL..
and because of that day, i failed my math test,was very dissapointed.
when i was eleven, things started to change. i realized i was losing myself... it just was a big blur, puberty took its toll on me..and thats when the fun begins..
middle school?FUCK YOU. i hated it, with a burning passion. i was 13,weighed only 65 pounds. i was sooo fucking ugly: i was chubby,short, had no friends, acne, you know:the works. i was a band geek, played the viola. these two girls in my class allways talked soo much shit about me: "why are you 65 ibs? look at me i weigh more than you and i have a flat tummy, where do you shop? cause you wear ugly clothes,you need to shave, your ugly." etc. omg. i wanted kill those girls.
boys? even worse. i started to like boys when i was about 8, after three years of fierce lesbianism crushes. i was allways by myself. boys would throw shit at me. idk maybe i did deserve it. the only way i could get people attention was by hugging every person i could find i thought that even though i just couldnt talk to people, as might as well hug them. it did work for awhile. then people started to hate me and call me a lesbian. my dad realized how bad i lacked social skills soo, with the help of a counselour, i got therapy.
seventh grade begun.. however, our dad came into the room one day and said these words: we're moving!
soo i loved up north, worcester county. finally: no apartment, no yelling. i had my own room! and everything seemed alright. UNTILL...i started school.
at first i was glad to be away from my old school. finally be myself, and not be scared. howver it was worse. i became a complete nutjob. but i had a friend, and it was a good/bad relationship... but still i felt outta place. my sister had friends back home. but we moved and didnt gve a fuck about this new world we live in.
most people thought i was cute, but i was still fat, and people made fun of me because of it. i was still very ugly. my acne has gotten worse. my parenst got more strict when it comes to friendships. i was already not allowed to visit people in their homes. but i wanted to get out and explore this new place i was beginning to call home, but i could not. mother was overprotective(AND STILL IS!) and my dad coulnt do shit about it. soo i remained awkward around people, kinda sucked. but 8th grade was awesome/horrible. i came outtta the closet, and more girls ran away from me. but i didnt care..
then came this: HIGHSCHOOL! YEAH i can finaaly get outta middle school! same ol same ol': same acne, same weight problem,still couldnt hang out with people. i started to wear better clothes, but people mocked me cause i didnt look my age. i was 15. i became friends with the seniors,which my mother didnt approve of. became more rebellious: had a couple of stoner friends, it was funn. however freshman year was a blast, even though i couldnt talk to people still, but i was a huge bitch!hahahaha
sophmore year: complete hell! i was a loser, began to loose weight. my face got a little better despite having two large burns on my lips. my friends come and go. most of the m graduated or moved to other schools. was very outta place: my schedule was chnaged thre times. was with all those assholes for class. the bulliying never stopped. i hated people. i became HUGE BITCH because of this: wanna say hi? when fuck you and dont talk to me...then it was over. and i lost even more weight!
*over two yeears i've lost a total of 19 pounds! went from 95 to about a 76*
and now im three months shy from becoming a senior. wow, it happened soo fast. right now everything seems better. im legal age, i can do things on my own. but mother is still overprotective. yes i lived a very shitty life,but it was worth it. i am what i am and that all that i am. i think im prettier, as you can see. im glad i lost soo much weight,even though i have a eating disorder. im still VERY VERY SHORT, UNDER 5'0(make it 4'5,and a half) friends come and go: i dont care about that anymore. i'll be doing me..for now.
if you like this story, cool! now here some fashion pictures!
marcelina sowa Amica Italy April 2010
Pepli
Photo: Bill Georgoussis
style by : Giulia Bassi
georgoussis.com
and here are some behing the scenes photos for the video" Solitaire"
alicewonderland2.blogspot.com
*video no longer exist? ahhhhhhhh!*
From Muse Spring 2010
Donatella Versace
back to the roots
Photo : Roger Deckker
style by Tamara Cincik
scanned by:blackangel41999(thefashionspot.com)
sweet jesus, she's sexy
i believe this is from Greg Kadel exihibition.
scanned by Luxx(thefashionspot.com
okay okay! im done. pce
NO IM LYING AGAIN! i just got home about an hour ago. and im wicked bored! i can do three things:post photography pictures,read, or do my schoolwork. ah, i give up, as might as well finish up that work. now im done!
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