kim kardashian wedding

yup, blogging in school for the second to last time :(
and since im in school.. i can't talk bout the fashion stuff i want to go through now..sorry :(
but yeah, i've been pissed off lately. im mostly pissed at myself actually, and no its not because of whats going on in school...

the last three months have been horrific, seriosuly. i have changed, mostly for good. i've stopped getting in trouble in school, got my shit together,and now im finishing the year smoothly. at the same time, im terrified. i really need to plan out my senior year, because, like i've said many times before, im leaving this town for good.

legit four days after i turned 18, everything fell to pieces. i've stopped my psychotic infaturation witha boy, got my shit together over the weekend, had fun talking to other guys..then all of a sudden. it happened again: the school found out about the demons within my closet have come back to haunt me, this boy wont speak to me,tried to hangout with another boy, but now he fucking hates me.. i havent spoken about the incident ever since it occured in school, now i only talk to people who used to be complete jerks to me.

knowing what i've done the last three months is now destroying me. i legit cant move on like this. which is why i want to leave this fucking town. everyone knows eachother, making drama far worse. i want to go to school far away in another district (another county). i've asked people to hangout with me, but 99.9% of the kids here either work or play hockey for a living(either dek hockey field hockey, i dont give a fuck)

haha i sound like a fucking three year old, but yeah... i wish i could say "im sorry" to every boy, every girl who wants thought of me as a friend. i can take back all the stupid shit 've done since march, i really want too. i need to learn to keep my fucking mouth shut, so people wont treat me like shit again.

i dont know if im going to finish this when i get home, but whatever.